Boot - the Three-Point Plan
BOOT – “In the world I grew up in, it was only the complete psychos who wouldn’t accept a smack in the teeth for the unequivocal assertion of one’s God-given human rights that it was. But I came to recognise that there were people out there who, instead of getting on with their own lives, wanted to get on with other people’s and the greatest threat to them doing that was people like me who might talk straight to them. If the likes of me showed his head above ground, they were right in there to root us out and nip us in the bud. You can tell by the horticultural metaphors the kind of socialisation schemes they thought I needed.”
MIFF – “I went out with this plasterer called Phil for a while but he got overconfident with his body, did headstands against the door and I went in and kicked him in the face. He bought a pub called the Nelson with this Scot called Highland Pete. A truck ran into it and knocked out one end, so they re-named it the Half-Nelson and ran cage fighting nights. A lawyer called Sue kept them going for a while but her cat had a stroke and she had to quit to look after it. In the end Phil overdosed on a homeopathic remedy for flatulence and Pete won turkey number H5N1 in a raffle, re-heated it and died of food poisoning.”
ASBO – “There’s a lot of ways you can go with stuffed fashion models. I mean, the original concept of having them in glass cases need only be your point of departure. To me, that goes straight to heart of the Victorian natural history project, which saw living things in terms of frozen appearance rather than ecological relationship - classified rather than holistic. What the Victorians deliberately avoided was showing the incredible violence needed to achieve their static vision. Think of the amount of killing and disembowelling that went into setting up those displays. That could be where you come back in – the synergy with the violence and self-hate that weaves its dark thread through the fashion industry. It’s a great concept. You can’t loose.”
…could these three really save civilisation as we know it?
